By Jake Rusby
Danish author Karen Blixen once wrote: “The cure for anything is salt water – tears, sweat or the sea.” For North Shields newcomer Louise Tomlinson, this quotes rings truer than for most.
Just two years ago, in September 2022, Louise lost her husband Marc, and her two young children – George and James – lost their dad. And as her family works their way through grief, the sea has come to play a central role in their healing.
Louise, now 44, was born in Forest Hall, but relocated to County Durham in 2004, after meeting her future husband while working at a software company in Newcastle. The pair married and spent the next two decades embarking on adventures together – they even spent their last wedding anniversary climbing Scafell Pike.
It was on an adventure in Scotland that tragedy struck the family: Marc was camping with his brother when he suffered a fatal heart attack.
Louise says: “He died on the day of the Queen’s funeral. Marc was really outdoorsy, and that’s how I got into it all really. Ironically, he was actually in the Mountain Rescue for a long time, too, and they were needed when he died. He had a very dry sense of humour and he’d probably have found that funny.”
Last year, a visit to North Shields to take part in the New Year’s Day Dip kick-started a new relationship for Louise and her boys – with the North Sea. All of a sudden, two-hour round trips became the norm every weekend, as the trio splashed and swam their way through their trauma, together, often heading out at 4am, under a blanket of stars, to catch the sunrise at King Edward’s Bay. Before long Louise had met an assortment of like-minded sea-lovers through Dip Club, which has become a huge part of her life. She also runs regularly.
In February of this year, Louise finally ‘took the plunge’, and moved back to her native North East, buying a house on the marina where she and her boys can see the water every time they gaze out of the window.
Louise, who is a freelance artist but also teaches part-time, says: “It felt like the sea was calling me back to the North East. I felt quite isolated where we were; we needed to be in a wider community. I’m so glad we did it. We’ve made so many friends and we feel part of something.
“I have got a lot of life left and I’m a positive person. I’m the boys’ only role model now and I try to show them every day how to be resilient. They sea-dip with me, and I think that’s helping them, too.
“The grief won’t ever leave, but being where we are and doing what we do is helping. I think of grief like a coat that never quite fits, but you still have to wear it.”
And Louise has put that expression into practice: as she sits in Woods Coffee, in Tynemouth, telling her story while embracing a hot cup of peppermint tea, she points out that the slightly shabby, oversized jacket she has on actually belonged to her late husband; her grief embodied in a piece of clothing.
She spent the start of the day much like she spends every other – in bracing salt water. And that’s where you will find her most mornings: at King Edward’s Bay with her boys, with the sea helping to wash away her grief, one wave at a time.
